Who has shown you trust, and given you great responsibility? On the flip side have you ever lost trust in someone? Trust is something we hold in high value. What do we do when someone has broken that trust, or how do we regain it? This week we’ll be looking at several stories from scripture to build and repair trust.
Handout | PowerPoint | Transcript
Good morning, everybody. All right, let’s pray. Father in heaven, thank you for the opportunity to gather together as we continue our series on the relationship blueprint. And as we look at trust today, leading guidance in Jesus name. Amen.
Just as a quick recap, what was the first week that we. What was it that we talked about the first week? First week we did a bad job at listening. I did not do a good enough job. I’m going to take ownership on that not being clear enough about that. So number one is listening. What did we talk about the second week? We talked about caring for other people. All right. Last week Bill had the very uncomfortable topic about talking about respect. All right, how do you respect others? How do you respect people who are in authority over you? Is a hot button issue that I talked about in every group this week that I was in today.
I want to talk about trust. Why is trust important in a relationship? Jeff Strite tells of a story. When his nephew was about nine, I think his name was Josh, he and his nephew were outside playing around in the yard and they were playing tag. And so of course his nephew tags him. He turns around and then he starts running. But then you see, you know how kids when they’re younger, they run but they start to look back. Well, you know where I’m going with this, right? He runs and to the look of Jeff and his sister’s horror, he starts running towards an object. And just as he turns around, his face slammed right into a tree and his teeth looked like they went in to bite a piece of bark. Okay. You ever put your face against bark, especially I don’t know what kind of tree, but the kind that’s big enough to where you could easily bite a piece of bark off, right? And so as every nine year old who’s got a face full of bark starts to cry and he’s upset, there was a little blood, okay. Nothing tremendous. They had to double check. Like, are his teeth okay? Teeth were fine. There was some blood. Now obviously running straight into a tree full force would probably cause most 9 year olds to Be very scared and not trusting of their running skills anymore, right? So they take him inside, they put him on his bed, and his sister, the kid’s mom, and I think the kid’s grandma, they try to do their best to console this kid, but he’s just having none of it. And Josh cried. I don’t want to run anymore. Mom and grandma were not getting through to him. So he said, okay. Jeff steps and he says. He puts his hand. He puts both hands on his shoulders and he says, josh, it’s gonna be okay. And Josh, it was not Josh. And he looks dead in the eye. It’s gonna be okay.
Who in your life has shown that they can be trustworthy? It’s hard sometimes because when somebody lets you down, how easy is it to rebuild that trust? When they’ve lied to you, they’ve fallen short, it’s hard to trust them again. Amen. When you look through the Bible, what are some stories that you can think of where somebody placed a lot of trust in another person? I think of Ruth and Naomi. Okay, Ruth was married into a family of believers. She comes from a different country, but yet she tells Naomi, her mother in law, I will go with you and be with your people. Essentially, right? And so she has to trust and go to a different land that is not her own. I think of David and Jonathan. David was Saul’s mortal enemy and Jonathan was Saul’s son. And yet it seemed like they were best friends forever, right? They had to place a ton of trust in each other. David had to trust Jonathan because what if Saul’s father, What if Saul got to Jonathan and forced him to give up David? Jonathan never betrayed him. Obviously, there are plenty of examples of Jesus and the disciples in the journey that Jesus was here on earth, where the disciples had to learn to trust him. And in a sense, as we’ll read later in your lesson study this week, Jesus placed his trust in the disciples. I think of Abraham and Isaac as Abraham tied Isaac down. How do you think Isaac felt? This is awkward. But he trusted his father. And obviously Abraham had to trust God. There’s also Deborah and Barak.
And I think for every moment of trust, trust begins with, I think, in a sense, Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. Trust in the Lord with all of your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge him, and he will direct your path. We have to have discernment in order to know how to trust. Amen. And what better discernment than that which comes from God?
Now I want to go to A story that exemplifies trust. Okay, I want to go to Acts chapter six. So let’s open to Acts 6. And these are some of the verses. Hopefully we’ll be able to get to all of them today. But I want to go to a chapter, the Bible where the disciples, they have a lot on their plate and there’s a situation that pops up where they realize they cannot control and do everything. So let’s go ahead and dive into this story. It’s also known at the top as the choosing of the seven. Okay, are we all there? Okay, thank you. All right, Acts chapter six. Let’s start at verse one. “In those days when the number of the disciples was increasing, the Hellenistic Jews among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of the food.”
Now, when it says Hellenistic, that means the Greek speaking Jews, okay? Verse 2. So “the 12, or also known as the apostles, the 12 gathered all the disciples together and said, it would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables. Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and what wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the Word.”
So verse five, it says, “this proposal pleased the whole group. They chose Stephen, a man full of faith of the Holy Spirit. Also Philip, Prochorus, Nicanor, Timon Parmenas, and Nicholas from Antioch, a convert to Judaism. They presented these men to the apostles who prayed and laid their hands on them. And so the word of God spread. The number of disciples in Jerusalem increased rapidly and a large number of priests became obedient to the faith.”
All right, this is a very interesting story. There’s a couple things that are happening, okay? So overall, the big picture, the church, Praise God, is growing. But during that time, did the Roman Empire appreciate people joining this church? Did the Jewish community appreciate that Christianity was growing? Obviously not. Okay? And so there were times where they had to band together and they had to look out for one another. Now, the apostles, though, had a lot on their plate. They had a lot of responsibility. And there arises an issue where the Greek speaking Jewish believers are being overlooked, in particular their widows. They had to help care for one another. And so they. And nobody denies it, right? So they get together and they come up with a plan. Hey, let’s delegate this issue. Let’s choose seven people. Let them choose who should be part of helping to take care of this problem. And they come up with seven individuals Notice as well.
It’s interesting that, you know, when you think of the early church, right, you think of Paul, you think of Peter, and in a sense, they had to be good people. They had to be. In a sense, we lift them up and we think, oh, they’re so perfect. But in truth, there were even issues in the early church. Can we agree on that? Okay. Nobody denied that the Greek speaking widows were being overlooked. Now they resolved this though. Okay, pick seven people. I’m going to read the names again as well. Philip, Prochorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas and Nicholas. Do those sound like Jewish names? What did these sound like? They sound like Greek names. And I think it was wise of them. Why did they choose seven Greek individuals? Because who better to directly understand the needs of those who are being overlooked, right? And obviously they could easily speak to them, but also, what was the basis? Why were they chosen? They were chosen because of the Holy Spirit. They could see that they were being led by the Holy Spirit. And also, what was the other ingredient that they needed? Wisdom. Is that something that you just say, hey, I have a lot of wisdom, so sign me up? No, right? When you choose somebody, it’s because of they have seen you, they have heard you. They have heard you speak, they’ve seen how you conduct yourself. They’ve seen that God was. They saw that God was present as you. If you continue to read actually in chapter six and seven, you’ll see that Stephen definitely was full of the Holy Spirit and he was very wise. Their reputation is what carried them to why they were chosen. They had trust in these individuals. They were given this responsibility. And because of that, the gospel went even further than they could have imagined. It says at the very end, even priests were being converted.
I think of another story too in scripture, in Moses. Can you imagine leading thousands and thousands and thousands of people and he was the head of this huge group and everybody came to him with their problems because people were not being fair, right? Can you imagine being the head judge of everything going on? And so what happens, Moses, father-in-law says, you got too much on your plate, you need to delegate. So they came up with a certain amount of guys, hey, here’s the expectations, please go take care of that. All of a sudden Moses could, with much clearer head and be able to think, could lead the people of God. Much like the disciples, the 12 apostles. It’s not that they were beneath them, but they were so responsible with praying and teaching that to add this, it was taken away from their influence to be able to teach and go around. So they said, hey, let us delegate this responsibility to other people.
All of this requires what? Trust. It takes a lot to trust that people will do the right job. And I think in another way of saying it, they will do it in a timely fashion. Amen. How many of you, those of you who are moms and dads, you know, you try to teach your kids to do the dishes, to know how to do laundry, how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, right? You want to make your kids become self sufficient at some point, right? And then sometimes you have to say, hey, please remember to go take the trash out. And then maybe Thursday morning at 7am you hear the trash truck and you think, was the trash taken out? Maybe, maybe not. And you go and you see nothing’s out there and you got a full trash can the whole week and you’re not going to make it, right? So trust, you have to build trust. What does it mean? How can we build trust?
Okay, as we build trust. Building trust requires honesty and transparency. Had a conversation with somebody recently and the point was made, man, this person, whenever they say something, they’re honest, even when it’s sometimes hard to hear. But at least I know that person is telling me what they believe and what is true. Followers of Jesus, should we be truthful? I think so. Because the moment you try to hide something or you try to disguise, or you try to lie, credibility goes down and it’s hard to build that up. And to be transparent, try not to hide anything.
So building trust requires honesty and transparency. But also building trust requires consistency. Be consistent in your thoughts and actions. What does that mean? What? Can I change my mind? Sure, absolutely. You know, look, over time we grow and you gain a little bit more wisdom, you gain a little bit more knowledge and realize, you know what, I did not think that I didn’t see. From this perspective, choose to grow. Awesome. But if you’re changing your mind every day. Now, children, do they desire stability and trust? So being consistent with your thoughts and your actions doesn’t mean you have to stay the same. Because if you’re not growing, well, that’s going to be a problem. When you first got married, are you the same exact person as you were a year ago, five years ago, 20 years ago, 50 years ago? My wife has changed me, by the way. You know, I’m a different person for the better, right? We influence each other. And if you want to have a long, healthy, fulfilling relationship that requires trust. It means being honest even when you don’t want to be because you don’t want to hurt the person’s feelings or you have to acknowledge things. But building trust, you know, there’s somebody who I talk to and it’s hard because this person can be, they tell the truth. But sometimes you just feel like, can you please be a little more tactful? But at least I know where I stand with that person. That builds trust. So if you want to have stability, build trust. And let’s just face it, people can hear you say something, but what does it mean with your feet in what you do? So be consistent.
Additionally, building trust requires active listening. So we talked about in the first week, intentionally listen. What are they trying to say? And as you listen, maybe it’s also good just to double check and say, hey, am I hearing you correctly? Is this what you’re saying? When somebody knows that you’re intentionally listening, even if you disagree, at least to be known and heard, builds up trust because you’re not just passing them off. How often do we see that? We see people just screaming at each other because they’re not wanting to listen. They want to prove that they are right. That’s easy to do, but it’s gonna solve anything. It’s not gonna solve anything. You have to listen even if you disagree, but be honest in a loving, tactful way. Share what is also important to you as well.
Now, one of the things that we have to acknowledge is building up trust sometimes also requires forgiveness. Trust requires working through issues, building back trust. Let’s go to a couple chapters over. I want to go to Acts chapter 15, okay, little-known story, Acts chapter 15. And I want to read starting at verse 36. Okay, starting at verse 36, chapter 15, verse. Verse 36. And here we see that there’s a disagreement between Paul and Barnabas. Okay, we all there? All right, starting at verse 36. Sometime later, Paul said to Barnabas, let us go back and visit the believers in all of the towns where we preached the word of the Lord and see how they’re doing. Okay, you would think, all right, let’s go check on people. Let’s hear them out. Maybe. Let’s see how can we help them. Verse 37 though, says Barnabas wanted to take John, also called Mark, he was sometimes known as John, Mark right with them. But verse 38. But Paul did not think it wise to take him. Uh oh, because he had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not continued with them in the work. So we see a disagreement. Jean Marc had deserted his crew, his boys. Barnabas, though, he’s like, maybe he’s a little more forgiving, a little more understanding. Hey, come on, let’s take him on. Let’s. Maybe we can rebuild this trust. We have to mentor him. And Paul’s like, nope, nope, nope. He deserted us. Gone.
Verse 39. They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company. Barnabas took Mark and sailed for Cyprus. But Paul chose Silas and left, commended by the believers to the grace of the Lord. He went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches. There was such a sharp disagreement between Paul and Barnabas. And Paul and Barnabas had been serving for some time. They ate together, walk together, they travel together. In chapter 15, they have such a sharp disagreement that they choose to go their own path. That has to have been painful, John. Mark bailed on them. Barnabas wanted to mentor him, and Paul cut him off again. You see, even in Bible times, they dealt with challenges for Paul. He could not trust John. Mark. Now, is this the end of the story? Well, if we go through and continue. First Corinthians, 9, 6. Okay, let’s jump over to 1 Corinthians 9, 6. Let us see. Is Barnabas mentioned again? First Corinthians 9, verse 6. And you’re going to understand why Barnabas wants to come bring Mark along. Okay, now, Paul writes in First Corinthians, the first letter to Corinth. It says, or is it only I and Barnabas who lack the right to not work for a living? So we see later on that Paul and Barnabas, actually, we assume this is the same. Barnabas were working together. Okay, let’s go now flip over a couple more chapters. Let’s go to Colossians, chapter four. Sorry, not a couple books. Colossians, chapter four, verse ten. Okay, Colossians four, verse ten. We there? Okay. My fellow prisoner Aristarchus sends you his greetings, as does who? Mark. The cousin of who? Uh. Oh, we had some family drama before you received instructions about him. But if he comes to, you, welcome him. So you can kind of understand why Barnabas was a little more hesitant to cast his cousin off aside. Right? Okay. You cut your family off. If you’re blood, you got to try to stick together. Right? But Paul didn’t trust him. And yet we find, though there is that trust. At least what I could see.
Last one. Second Timothy, chapter four. Second Timothy, chapter four. And this is later on in Paul’s life. He’s writing, he’s giving instruction to Timothy. Okay, four, verse 11. Well, there. Okay, verse 11. Only Luke is with me. Get who? And bring him with you because he is, what, helpful to me in my ministry. Tradition says that John Mark came back. There’s also another thread that says this is the same Mark who wrote the Gospel of John. I’m sorry, Gospel of Mark. Pastor can’t speak today. Trust. When you lose it, it is hard because you have to prove that you can be trustworthy through your thoughts, through what you say and what you do. You know the hard part about trust, too, especially when you give it and it’s broken. It’s so hard to want to give it again. Amen. Especially if it’s somebody who’s close to you. Now, I can’t speak for every situation. There are some things that just. Even if something bad happens, well, you have to be smart, you have to have diligence, you have to have wisdom from God. Is this situation, can we reconcile and repair it? And even if we reconcile and repair it, it may not always be the same because we remember things right. But where we can, let us reconcile, let us love, build back trust. And it doesn’t happen overnight. Sometimes it takes time. But overall, as believers, as leaders, as parents, as husbands and wives, as neighbors, we have to build up trust and trust. Again, it doesn’t happen overnight. But if we are consistent, if we are consistently loving and kind and honest, and we show that not just by saying, but following through. If you say you’re going to be somewhere at 6pm on a Wednesday, be there at 6pm if you’re going to be there for the morning hike at 7am on Sunday, be there on time, ready to go. Trust. May we be faithful people who are compassionate, kind, loving and willing to be trusted not only with the gospel, but caring for others and loving others.
Father in heaven, we thank you for the opportunity to move forward, lead and guide us, help us to be people that can be trusting and also give trust. Jesus name. Amen.
I completely forgot. Can we just throw the screen up one more time? This week, this week, who do you trust and why? And on the flip side, who has shown great trust in you when you feel like maybe you didn’t even deserve it? Okay, so this week, this week, practice the principles of building trust that we talked about. Listening, being consistent, you know, caring, listening, okay?
And practicing forgiveness. Practice the principles of building trust and record or share your lessons with somebody that you trust. Okay? If you feel like you can’t talk to anybody, write it down though, okay? And go back and see, hey, here’s what I’ve learned. Here’s where I’m at in my journey. But if there is somebody, whether it’s your spouse or your best friend or whoever, share what you have learned this week. Amen.
All right, Grace and peace, everyone. We’ll see you next week.